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Are you one?
Well if so, you might get a real kick and/or blessing out of this.
Corey has been doing all sorts of ringtones for our phones and Casey demanded to have Can't Touch This...which led to The Finding of The Link.
I was really amazed. Maybe you will be too.
[oh...just fyi...there's a blast of music when the page opens, just so it doesn't make you jump like it did me!]
I'm getting closer. Thing is, I'm not sure exactly what I'm getting closer to....
Completion of a most dreaded task?
Or succumbing to the agony of actually doing said task.
Gah!
I'm past this point....
Somehow, this software way of doing this gets a little harder with each year. Probably because the blasted "powers that be" keep changing things, adding stuff and taking stuff out, etc., so forth, ad nauseum.
Blech.
Add in one of those pesky ten - nintey - nine forms and it exponentially increases the difficulty of filing yourself.
And I really like having software, don't get me wrong. It's TONS better than trying to do it all on your own....BUT.....it can get a bit ridiculous. So hard to keep up with what the daggone program is doing..."Where did that number come from?" --- "Why did it send me to this form?" ----- "Didn't I already answer that question?" --- "How come it's printing a blasted BOOK!?!?!" and so on.
Gah.
Anyhow, I finally got one really annoying part done...after crawling around in the attic to find the papers from several years ago. Now it's a matter of feeling confident enough to click that "file" button.
For those of you who don't know, I absolutely loathe the Eye-R-Ess. I never, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever want to have to go through the nightmare of dealing with those imbecils ever again!!!!!!
*ahem*
So, there's my day. Whassup wif you?
WOW! I just clicked over to my clustr map and was I ever shocked to see so many red dots in SO many places!!! Wow. I am STUNNED!!!
And yet? I 'm a little sad. Yeah...the 'no comments from new visitors' thing. *sigh*
Would you believe it? I've read a couple different posts (I"ll have to go find the links now!) about commenting, commenters, re-commenting and um...well, whatever you'd call it when the blogger comments in reply to their own commenters....um, would that be re:commenting? I dunno....
So anyhow, yes. I'm as vain as the next blogger in craving comments. Not just for the sake of a high number at the end of my entries, but when I know new people are visiting? Well, it's just nature to wonder "who" you are, where you're from, how and why you came here and what you thought about your visit.
And now, the inevitable plea....if you're new here, or you're a lurker who's never commented before....would you please just say hi? I won't bite. For goo'niss sakes! I can't even reach you from way over here! ;) And even if I could...I've had alllll my shots. (and then some!)
Okay. Gratuitous begging over.
Thanks in advance.
I have no title. Not even an inkling of one. My brain is dead...or at least passed out.
Um, lessee. This morning was Karen's birthday breakfast, so the Girls' Club met at our newly-confirmed "place" --- Cr@cker B@rrel. It was fun ot catch up with each other. DIane, as per usual, had somewhere she had to be for her daughter, so Karen and I headed up to the bookstore by ourselves.
That's what the woman wanted to do for her birthday! LOL! I'd never been to this place so it was a treat for me, too. When we got there, she was all spazzed out because all the used books were gone and all they had was a wide and varied selection of new, marked down books.
I enjoyed looking at them, though and soon we were both wandering around (being the only ones up there) laughing and reading the strange or applicable titles to each other. I found some Re@der's Dige$+ fix-it-yourself books for WAY cheap. We both got one. I found two good history books, a book written by a Harvard med school graduate for Corey, a book called When a Man Turns Forty-A Midlife Manual for Tommy's upcoming birthday (not that he'll read it, but it'll at least be funny to open in front of everyone), got my sister a mystery novel about cats for her birthday in March. Don't ask. The woman is crazy about cats! I also found a few other reference books, so obviously, I am now completely broke. Sheesh!
We had a nice time talking on the drive up and back and then she dropped me off at my truck and I headed home after picking up some milk which we were totally out of.
Corey's working with my dad today, and Casey wasn't keen on having to stay at my mom's so he just stayed home. He reported to me via two-way several times. "I'm finished eating breakfast." -- "I'm about half-way done with school." -- "I called the Y about signing up for basketball. They thought I was the mom, so I just let them think it." (??!!!!) "I'm all done with my lessons. Can I turn on the computer now?"
So, I came home to find that he had indeed finished his lessons and his room was a disaster area and he hadn't picked up any of his dishes.
Sheesh. This is my messy kid. Not that the other one is overly neat, but he does tend to pick up after himself a little more than my youngest child. *sigh*
Tommy's not due home til later this evening or tonight. I'll have to take Casey to basketball practice tonight....but at least I'll have some reading material now! Ha!
I need to get busy doing some stuff and I totally don't feel up to it. Very tired and kinda achy today. Gah.
I can't wait for Heaven. I'm sick and tired of feeling tired and sick. Heh.
Have a beautiful day.
[OH YEAH! I forgot to tell ya'll....Corey's website if finally up. He's still working on it, but the general design and stuff are up....and he did all the graphics and coding himself!! Go take a look....here. }
I didn't get around to telling you all, but last week, I was alone for a brief period of time. The boys both left with my dad for a Nashville conference on Wednesday afternoon. Then Tommy left for the same conference at 5am the next morning.
Casey and my dad came back late Thursday night. Tommy and Corey didn't get back til very late Friday night.
*sigh* All the time in between was commandeered by my mother. Which was okay. It's just that I knew she was trying to fill my time in hopes of "cheering me up". That's how messed up I've been lately. Even my mom noticed.
So anyhow, we had a good time running around all day Thursday. I wouldn't have even bothered to get out of bed, I think, because that's the day my shoulders just stiffened up like crazy. But we had lunch out together and spent quite awhile just hanging around afterward and talking at our table. That was nice...and unusual.
Casey had a ballgame at 8:30 AM!!!! on Saturday, and he'd arranged for us to pick up his pal on the way. Two of their best players were not there, and they played a team who had apparently recruited a giant since the last time they played. I swear, this guy looked like he could have been 18 except that he had absolutely no facial hair. That's the only thing that kept me from accusing the team of bringing in an adult. Bah!
They lost once again. *sigh* I'm praying they can win at least one game before the seaon's over...which is in two more games. I'd hate for them to end with nothing but losses. They are the most disadvantaged team in that only two of the players have ever played on a team before and of the rest, about three of them are just not very well-coordinated.
Anyhow...Saturday was a busy day. We shopped a bit after the game, then we headed home to get some lunch, etc. We lazied around the rest of the day. I took a short nap, then we fixed pizzas for supper for the boys (the friend spent the night) and Corey, Tommy and I watched the last current DVD of Alias we had.
Fast forward to this week and I had the doc appointment Monday, then Tucker's grooming Tuesday and Tommy left for the mountains to get his continuing education hours in for work. He'll be back sometime late Thursday.
Tucker's been really whiny since his haircut yesterday. He's really wiped out today, too, even though he slept through the night.
Come to think of it, so did I!!! That hasn't happened in a long time! I remember changing positions once and maybe recall Tucker jumping off the bed one time, but other than that, I was snoozin'! Doc told me to bump up to two sleep tabs, but I only upped to 1.5 last night. I'll see how that works for me. So far, so good.
It's wet and cold outside today. Well, actually, it's cold IN HERE too. At least I think it is. The boys aren't complaining, so it must just be me. I'm tired of feeling so cold all the time.
I used to always say that being too cold was better than being too hot because you can always put on some more clothes....but there's only so much you can take off. But I'm beginning to wonder. If I put on much more clothing, I'm not going to be able to walk!
So...Tucker's all smooshed up behind me in my computer chair. He's stuck to me like glue since picking him up yesterday. I wonder if he's getting sick on me or if he's just off kelter because of the grooming + Tommy being gone + all the confusion of last week....??? Who knows?
Okay...boring. I know. Sue me. *heh*
Have a lovely day!
There's gotta be something entirely, severely nay, grieviously wrong when one of your kids takes one of the dog's squeaky toys and squeaks it....
.....
.....
.....
WITH HIS BUTT CHEEKS?!??!?!??!?!?!?!
Oh....
Saints preserve us!
(wait...CLOTHED butt cheeks....don't wancha thinkin' TOO nastily of us....gah!)
...to my backyard.
This is what it looked like at our house over the weekend.
'Course, it don't look nothin' like that today.
I'm still cold, though. Sheesh.
Boy, do I feel lots better today!!!
Wow! Not that I feel like conquering the world, but this is WAY lots better than the past couple of weeks.
Has the new med and return to brand-name med kicked in this quickly? I doubt it.
Maybe it's just that today was appointed as My Good Day already? Possibly.
Is it just that knowing Doc is fully aware of and concerned about the severity of my struggles with depression? Most likely.
Whatever it is, I'm thankful. I've been headachy today. Sinuses are stopped up tighter than a D0lly Part0n outfit. (sorry Dolly, but...I mean c'mon!) I refilled the sinus med and need to ask Doc about whether I'm supposed to stay on this stuff, or at least how long I'm supposed to, since there are no more refills. Maybe he just didn't write many refills in case it didn't work? I dunno.
We've been to get Tucker's hair cut. WOW!! Do him wook beddah!!! Yes! Him doos! LOL!
He had a couple of really tight mats, the kind that are not so much tangled hair but are curls so tight they just wad up like they grew that way. Impossible to comb out, I'm here to tell you. So anyhow, he's trimmed a little closer than usual, which is fine, really because that keeps him looking better longer. I also had them trim his face more than we had been.
He's not quite as cuddly looking without his beard and mushy-tash, but that beard ends up all soupy when he's at the water bowl and it is forever getting those thorny burrs in it and THEN you have to dig those out! Gah!
Anyhow...I couldn't get a good shot of him, but here you go.
AFTER
The New & Improved Tucker
I assure you, he's not as dirty as he looks in that first picture. All his apricot poodleness comes out when it hair gets long. Otherwise, you can't tell he was ever anything but white.
He looks so tiny!! We drove all over the place looking for a sweater for him. NONE to be found! Not even in the prissy groomy store! They're awaiting an order. By then, he won't need a sweater anyway.
Ah well. If he gets too cold, we do have a poodle coatie thing he can wear. He hates it, though, so we'll see. Maybe if he's cold enough, he won't dawdle around outside so much!
Hope you're all having a wonderful day! (Oh, and I updated below (or here) about the doctor's visit....it's gotten a bit buried now, though...)
Thanks for all the prayers!!
Miss Mo-mo tagged me, so here I go......
Four jobs I have had:
Hostess, Cashier, Bookkeeper, Manager
Four Movies I could watch over and over:
Sound of Music, It Happened One Night, POTC, LOTR
Four Places I have lived:
Here, here, here and here?? Um, okay...I HAVE had four addresses...ALL in Kentucky and ALL in the same town!
248 This Road, 1430 That Road, 975 This Road and 1049 This Road.
Yes. I am dead serious!! ;)
Four TV shows I would watch...
LOST, Monk, Myth Busters, Dirty Jobs
Four vacations places I have been:
Florida, Texas, Virginia, Indiana
Four Websites I visit daily:
Um, mine, weather.com, too many blogs that equal way more than four!
Four fave Foods:
Greens, Potato Soup, Bacon and Pickles
Four places I'd rather be right now:
On vacation, In a jaccuzi, in a decompression chamber, in a jaccuzi (my joints are really killing me right now!)
Four bloggers I tag....
I refuse on the grounds it may alienate me. LOL! If you wanna, knock yerself out....just tell me if you do this so I can come by and read!
Brrrr.... here's a shot of the weather forecast for my area. I'm ALREADY freezing!! I love seeing the snow, though. We actually got almost three inches! WOW! I'm sure that's not impressive to you high-volume-snow people, but it's right nigh a miracle for SE Kentucky to get this much snow these days.
I'm thinking about getting this for Tucker:
He goes for a haircut tomorrow morning. After spending over three months growing out his fuzziness, he's a funny mess. Very hard to keep him clean and let's don't talk about the matting. GAH!
So, a haircut he gets. I'm taking him to the new place uptown. It's been highly recommended and it is a nice, clean place. It's also a fancy-shmancy pet doodads store. They had several prissy outfits for critters.
I think Tucker would just die of embarrassment! LOL!
BUT he doesn't have a sweater that fits his fatness anymore and he DOES like a good sweater when he's just lost his white fur coat, know what I mean?!?
When we were in the groomer store place, the few sweaters I saw, though not his size, were all pretty pricey. We don't want pricey. We want functional. We want warm. We want un-prissy. We want CHEAP!
See? We're not hard to please.
Anyhow, if they don't have a reasonalbly priced sweater in there, I think I'll just order that one.
Okay. That's it. No real reason for this post.
No.... Really none at all!
;) Tah-tah!
Wanted to share a photo with you....
That's the sky from my front yard. Cool, ain't it? I absolutely LOVE sky photos!! I'm serious. I'll stand out in the yard with my way-non-fancy digicam and shoot a ton of pix hoping to get the perfect one. Of course, as time moves along, so does the sun and clouds, etc. and I think, "OH! No, this is a great shot. No! I gotta get THIS shot, too! Wait! This is gorgeous...." And on and on and on. I end up with a bazillion of these shots. And I love 'em all!
Heh. Same with nature shots. One day, I shall have me a way-fancy digicam that can zoom and stuff and I shall take a bazillion pix of birds and trees and dogs and deer and the antelope play....
Uh. No, that's something else, but you get the idea. ;)
I go see the doc again today. This is the appointment scheduled back when he changed me to the different thyroid med to check and see how it's working for me. That means blood drawing. Do you remember The Bruise I got last time?! Ugh.
I'm gonna chug some water this time. Hopefully that will help!
I'm also going to talk to him about:
1. -- whether or not some of these new meds might be causing a dry, hacking cough. It's only occasional, but several years ago, I was taking some older blood pressure medicine. Because the newer stuff was so expensive, that's why! *urgh* Anyhow, one of the main side effects was a cough. I took it for nearly seven years without having a problem with that.
Then I got a cold. And a cough. That never went away and got so bad that I couldn't breathe during an attack. Gah.
So anyhow...we don't wanna be foolin' around with no meds that make me cough. NO WAY!
2. -- I'm also going to ask him if maybe the generic We||bu+rin isn't working so well. And/Or
3. -- if some of the new meds are causing an increase in the depression.
*sigh* It's been a really yucky couple of weeks in that area. Maybe I'll talk about it later. But anyhow, something needs to be done and I fear that if I get started talking to him about how bad it's (the depression) been, he'll want me to do one (or both!) of two things:::
-- see a "therapist". Been there, done that. No thanks.
YUCK! I hated it. I went about twice and get this...this therapist? This clinical s0cial w0rker? She was the lady who'd taken (quite crappy!) pictures at my wedding!!!! Um, can we say NO WAY!???!
Yes, we sure can. And I did. She'd ask the stupidest questions as I sat there, trying to keep my two young children occupied. What did I do for fun? Did I ever go out with friends? At that time, the only close-ish friend I had had SIX kids (three under 8 that were her new dh's and her own three, all under 8, too, one of which was an infant) and it was a little hard to "go out" considering all the littles we had between us.
Her mouth kinda dropped open. She asked me how I thought the therapy was going and I said, "Frankly, all I can think about is how much this is costing us and how we can't afford the extra financial strain."
That was the last time I went. No one ever called to check up on me...to see if I'd slashed my wrists or had some kind of psychotic break.
Gah. Some doctors just tick me off. I mean, not that I'd have gone back, but you'd THINK that a phsyc's office would at least call to follow up on that kinda thing...especially since I'd been sent there suffering from "major depression". Sheesh.
Okay, so the other thing that concerns me is that
-- he might also or instead want me to check into the mental health (or lack of!) floor at the hospital.
I was there when MIL had to be admitted. I won't be going there either, thank you.
It was like a prison and she was only there for a week. We were told we could NOT visit her and they took all kinds of things like her pens and nail clippers, etc. That was just TOO creepy and I felt so bad for her. But since she'd been manic for over four months, hardly ever sleeping and had caused THREE wrecks, finally totalling both of their new vehicles, in about 3 weeks' time? It was one of those "Duh!" moments when it was just obvious she needed intense treatment.
I am not there. Lord willing, I won't ever be. But it's getting hard. I can't keep on like this. Something's gotta change.
Okay...so I wasn't going to talk about the depression, right? But seems I did, so I guess I'll go now.
Have a wonderful day!!!
{UPDATAGE::: So, Tommy met me at the doctor's office. I wasn't sure he was gonna go OR if I even wanted him to go, but he did and it was okay. I pulled out my list of stuff to ask him and started right in on him.
He looked over the meds list and didn't see anything that should be causing a cough, so that's under observation still If it gets any worse, he'll start digging into the cause.
He said yes, the generic Wbu+rin is not as good as the brand-name, but many people do well with it. Since I don't, he wrote me a 'script for the real stuff. Thank God. I felt better just knowing that I'd get back on what had been working.
However, during the chat, the issue of depression coming up and all, I began to cry again. I do that a lot lately and I honestly don't know why half the time. I just want to cry. I want to bawl my head off and once you start me, there's no stopping me.
*sigh* So, he started asking me questions about how I was sleeping (better) and the headaches (also better) and the sinus (better as well) then we started talking about all the things I've been feeling...
Overwhelmed; Helpless; Hopeless; Useless; Unworthy; Unsuccessful; Lethargic; Disoriented; Bombarded; Suffocated; Indecisive...
I could go on, but you get the picture, right?
So, he added another med to help improve things even more than the W-bu+trin alone. It's called Sell-Ex-Ah. :) I'd never heard of it, but there's no reason I should have. Anyhow, so we're trying that now.
He did mention therapy and I let him know I wasn't at all interested in it. I told him about my experience with it before. He said fine, but if things didn't improve, he would be asking me again to see a psych. Gah!
I just hope this works. And would you believe it? I even told him about my blog! LOL! Yes, even including the name. ROFL! I told him how therapeutic it was for me. He didn't even laugh. He said that he knew of a lot of people, not necessarily from around here, but patients of collegues who kept blogs just for the purpose of venting, etc. He thought it was a great idea. At one point Tommy admitted that he didn't read it and Doc immediately said, "Well, you probably should...." He cracks me up.
Then we got to the blood letting part. It wasn't nearly as bad as last time, but she did end up having to go in the back of my hand right next to my knuckle. OUCH!!! That's one of the most painful places to do that!!! OWWW! (that's your warning of future bruise pictures, okay?)
Anyhow, Tommy went and picked up my 'scripts and came home for lunch. I bawled my head off all the way home. I dunno why. But I did. Tommy and I talked with the boys about trying to be a little more patient with me til I get over this hump. And now I've blown the rest of the day on the computer.
It's kept me busy, I guess. *sigh* But it doesn't make me feel very useful. I think I'll go do a load of laundry. That'll either make me feel more productive, or make me need a nap. Heh.
Have a great evening!}
The "add yourself to my weather map" didn't work. WAH!
It's just added your location to some random, anonymous map out there somewhere. *sniffle*
So....if you would be so kind as to email me your location, I will add you to the map myself. If you're not comfortable with that, I understand. I just love being able to see at a glance what everyone else's weather is like.
SOMEHOW I'll figure out how to let ya'll see it. *grumble*
My email is located on the sidebar in the Mind Fluff section. Heh.
Thanks!!!
I know a lot of ya'll have linked on my frappr, but I found another site I really like and it not only tells me where you are without telling me WHO you are, but it shows me your weather too!
I had to search out the weather info this morning. Specifically the barometric pressure and humidity.
MY JOINTS ARE ALL SCREAMING IN PAIN!!!!
Really! I feel like the Tin Man and THERE IS NO OIL IN MY CAN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I think I even got Dave topped now. It's just his ol' foot hurtin' him. My whole body is a bad foot, man! MY WHOLE BODY! Study on that awhile!
But I will not be whining like some people do.
*
*
*
At least not today. Heh.
So anyhow....I have some of ya probably on there, but if you don't mind, would you check and if I don't have your city listed, would you put it on there for me? I'd appreciate it. [Just type in your zip or city/state up at the top, click the li'l magnifying glass. When your page opens, up on the right next to the RSS button, there's an "Add To Favorites" link. Click that, and your place will be added to my favorites list. Simple as that!]
Have a non-achy day, wouldja?
Blessings!
Wow. Did I completely have Tommy all wrong?
Well, sorta.
I didn't get flowers yesterday. And I didn't have supper all ready. Of course, he didn't get home on time either, so....*shrugs*
I DID get an adorable bag (out of character for him to buy a fancy bag!) containing a very yummy-smelling vanilla candle in a stoneware crock and a heart-shaped box of sugar-free chocolates. But those were nothing compared to the card I got.
Now, Tommy's been a bit quirky in his card purchases over the years. He'll either get one that's ornate and overly elaborate (to me) or he'll get a really cheesy one or one that's pretty plain-jane. There seems to be no in-between for my man. Nuh-uh!
And another wierd thing he does? He signs his full name, like it's some sort of contract or something. That's about the most bizarre thing I've ever seen in the area of card-giving. But that's what he does. Whether it's mine, his parents', his kids....no matter. He will sign his full name to it, as if you may have forgotten it or something.
ROFLOL!!!
But last night? He outdid himself completely.
It's a beautiful little card, pink, but with no obligatory mention of the V word. Inside, it has blank white lining....except for what he wrote....
Yes, he misspelled some words, and his penmanship is atrocious, but ya know what?
On the facing side is a hand-drawn heart of "purfect" proportions.
Just the fact that he went to the trouble of writing out these things...when normally all I'd get is his entire, full name scrawled across the bottom of a card? It means the world to me.
My letter to him? Well....I have to admit, its intentions were to express my love for him, but it turned out to be a bit pessimistic.
I told him I love him.
But I don't know why he loves me.
I am sorry for being such a failure...
...so hard to love...
...so hard to live with...
...so hateful and negative and melancholy...
I am sorry for making him feel unloved.
I wish I could be a different person...
...the person he deserves...
...the person he probably thought he was getting.
But I love him, and I am thankful for his love.
Even though he's hurt me many times over the years.
I see that I have done the same to him.
God has always seen us through.
...but I don't know why.
Etc, etc, etc....
Pretty morbid, I guess. But it's what came spilling out of me.
After he read it, he came and hugged me. He told me he doesn't see what I see. Because I see things too negatively...too harshly. All he sees is the woman he loves.
*bawl*
Yeah. So over a pan of frying venison, we declared our love for each other.
Boring? Perhaps.
Sad? Possibly.
But true? Definitely.
I love my husband.
Even when it's not a commercializing money-grubbing holiday.
Heh.
Okay. So Mrs. Diamond has subtly repremanded me for not being all mushy about today and well...about life in general, I guess.
I mean, she's not like hounding me, but I was a bit callus about her lovey-dovey posts, and I didn't mean to be. But I was honest about my lack of mushiness. Heh.
So, here's not a Valentine's Day post, because I'm just not really into V-day. I hate the big push for spend, spend, spending to impress someone who may or may not even want to talk to you tomorrow. And for us married folk? Well, it's a bit like invalidating the importance of expressing our love to each other every single day!
The thing that really drove it home this year? Running into Casey's bball coach, who is in a second marriage...or whose wife is, I'm not sure....in W@lm@rt, with an armload of Valentine candy and other fluff. He really was a strange sight. He told us he'd just taken his wife to get her nails done and he had just thirty minutes to get his shopping done. He was headed over to women's clothing and then to the checkout.
Gah! It looked as if he was like covering all the bases to avoid some nasty wrath. To be fair, I don't know the woman, but everything I've detected from talking to him and her son, she's a pretty high-maintenence gal. Sheesh!
Anyhow, I guess in all honestly, I have to tell you that in the past, I have been a big "supporter" of Valentine's Day myself. I would always get a card and if possible a gift of some sort for Tommy.
Thing is....Tommy's never really been big on Valentine's Day himself. He's been known to forget certain people's birthdays, for goo'nissake! Not often, mind you, but it has happened. And not just that, but the second V-day we celebrated while dating...he showed up at my house to pick me up....late....and walked in, tossed a stuffed pink bear and a card in my lap, plopped down on the couch beside me and with my dad sitting there he announced, "There. I got a ticket getting that stupid thing."
Oooooooh. Yeah. Major silence going on out there in cyber space. I just KNOW it!!
But we did (obviously) get past that...seeing as how we've been married 20+ years. For a long time, it was one of those "things" between us, but I finally grew up and got over it.
I still always 'celebrated' the day as I said above. Most ot the time, Tommy worked such long hours, there was never a dinner out. Sometimes it was because there was just no extra money to go out. Sometimes it was simply that he was so tired, he would most likely fall asleep during any dinner or movie. It was a waste of time.
He's brought me flowers many, many times. Sometimes, even for NO REASON whatsoever....so I can't complain about that. Well, once I finally got him to stop going to the florist and spending OUTRAGEOUS amounts for the flowers he brought home. Gah! That really bothered me for him to spend $30 on a few flowers in a plastic vase with some tacky doohickey stuck in it ... that would be dead within three days!
I know that sounds ungrateful, but we didn't have the money to spend like that! SHEESH! I finally taught him to get flowers, NICE, PRETTY, HEALTHY flowers, out of the cooler at the grocery!!! Ahhhh, now those, I really love getting!! Special-feeling makers for a fraction of the cost! LOL!
So...he's mentioned the big day several times this week. I dunno why. I was in need of some unmentionables, and he insisted that I get several of those along with a cute pj set...something I never buy. Unless it's on sale or in the unlikely event that I need nice ones to go somewhere, I don't buy jammies. I'll wear Tommy's sweat shirts or gowns I've had for eons right up until they fall apart.
Now I have this pretty jammie set and some new...erm...unmentionables. I figure that is my "valentine" gift. And that's great.
But Tommy is hinting that he'll be arriving at home with something else. Flowers, I'm guessing. (and let me be clear that I always love getting flowers....something about that makes me feel so special!)
But....I didn't get anything, not even a card, for him. Partly because it's slipped my mind with all the headache crud, and partly because it just hasn't seemed really important to me. Normally, I'd have bought the thing several weeks ago. That's how I do things. Tommy waits until the last possible moment. (I don't know how he stands that!)
So...I feel bad. I plan on trying to have a good suppoer ready when he gets home and I've typed him out a letter on mushy-type stationery. But I feel like I've failed. Again.
Again.
I feel like a failure most of the time these days. And especially when it comes to Tommy and the house and the kids and....
*sigh*
Okay, so....here's to the day:
And here's hoping you mushy it up in whatever way you enjoy most.
Can somebody tell me why there were 8 search engine hits to my site for the words "colon cleansing at home"???? What da poo?!??!
And what about these:::
progesterone cream makes me sick
i m glad my wife only wears dresses
phobia to farts
golden retriever flatulance
how to care for a sick toad
schitzphrenic, and schitzphrenic medical disorder
society for the preservation of paragraphs (could there be one out there REALLY?)
pass me something wicked
Really, people! What's up with some of those?!?! Crazy! One might think I write a lot about farts and mental disorders around here!! Oh, and flatulance.
What is UP wid dat?!?
Okay, okay....I'll admit...I can see how most of those came up....but that sick toad thing??
I have no clue whatsoever....
I got an email from Claire telling me about dog post day and she sent me to Faith or FIction for an example.
LOL!
Okay, so after bewailing Tucker's fondness for midnight and beyond pee-poo runs, I guess I'll hafta talk about why I put up with such aggravations..
First of all:::
Yes! Definitely!
Lord knows, had you tried to tell me two years ago that I would house and fall in love with a poodle....a POODLE mind you....I'd have told you you had most of your screws loose and pointed you to the hardward store to get yourself a heavy-duty screwdriver! And FAST!
Cuz it's like this...I grew up on a farm. WIth big ol' outside dawgs...bird dogs, beagles, mutts of all shapes and sizes. Poodles were sissy dogs. Little fluffy doofuses for doofussy people!
Yeah...amazing huh? But that's what I used to think! The only poodles I'd ever seen were all wearin' one of those frou-frou hair cuts and usually some sort of jewelery...or painted pink, etc.
My piano teacher had a black toy poodle. Her name was Betsy and she was MEAN! And she looked menacing with her silver-black curls and her coal-black eyes. Add to that those white bared teeth and you had one scary little dog!!! I couldn't stand her!
So, when this girl friend of Corey's showed us her poodle, I thought "Oh gah! I don't wanna see no poodle!" But meet Olivia we did....and we found a very nice little white poodle.
Well, she was sorta pinkish when we first met her because The Girl had dyed her pink.
How CRUEL!
Anyhow...a bit later, we found out that she was pregnant.
The POODLE, not The Girl!! Sheesh!
And when she produced SEVEN little poodle puppies, the pressure was on for us to adopt one.
The only time we'd ever had a "house dog" was for about 4 or 5 months when Lucy got run over and Tommy spoon-fed her and treated her like a baby. It's a wonder we ever got her outta here! But once springtime arrived, she really wanted out...and I really wanted her out, too, because she commenced to shedding like there was no tomorrow! Urgh!
That's Lucy with her puppies a few months ago. She showed up here on our doorstep in 1997 and she's been here ever since. She's hateful at times and she's selfish and grumpy....but she's also a good dog when she takes a notion. But I prefer her outside and not in here sharing her leftover fur!
So, that was the only indoor dog we'd ever had! It just wasn't in my makeup to have a dog in the house, much less actually take one in that would HAVE to be inside! Inconcievable!!!
But take him we did. He was the fatty of the pack and you just couldn't help but laugh at his rooting in on each of his sibling's teat territory. Always looking for the next helping of milk, he was. Sheesh!!!
Here's a shot of him in all his apricot glory...
Here they are after Tucker became a little less wary of his new surroundings and started bossing everyone around...
Here's Tucker in his favorite mature sleeping position...sheesh!
Tucker loves to be pampered....obviously!
Another example of His HighAndMightyness:::
But Tucker's not all about being seen. Sometimes he's just about cuddling in a blanky!
And then there is Tucker, the Adveturous. See:::
Another example---the white puff is Tucker playing Ring Around The Fort with a buddy of his...
And of course, all that leads to Tucker, the Nastyness. Observe:::
For the most part, Tucker loves his human slaves.
But mostly, he loves Mama.
So, yeah. We love Tucker, even though he treats us like servants.
But that might be kinda sorta our fault.....
Thank you so much for all the prayers, guys. They have definitely worked. I feel tons better today than I did yesterday. Still a bit foggy-headed and still occasionally stumbling, but feeling SO much better!
The shrieking is a bit less, but still more than previously. I can still hear it even when other sounds are going on, but it's not as overwhelming. The headache is basically gone. I get twinges of it every little bit, but it doesn't just come and devour my head today. *whew*
I slept pretty well last night. I informed Tommy that he'd have to take Tucker for pee-poos as I was going to try actually SLEEPING. And since I had taken a SLEEPING AID, it would probably be a good idea if I didn't get up umpteen times during the night.
Well, he took him potty alright. But does he do like me? And go quietly, through the darkness and with much silence?
No.
He gets up, turns on the big light, calls for Tucker---LOUDLY--- and makes this big production of taking the dog to dump a load!
GAH!
So, while I didn't have to get up...I did have to wake up because even the folks over in the cemetery couldn't have slept through all the noise that man makes! Sheesh.
Anyhow, I am feeling lots better today. I am SO thankful! And very grateful for your prayers and concern.
Have a happy Thursday!!!
Boy, you'd think that I'd learn not to take too many new meds at one time. But really...I was hurting SO bad that I didn't care too much about that.
So, I took the decongestant-slash-be-n-edr-yl-replacement, I took the pain reliever stuff, and then about 11pm, I took the sleep med.
I probably should have taken the sleep stuff earlier, but y'know what? There wasn't any info on the bottle...just "take 1 or 2 at bedtime". Okie dokie, then.
When I got in the bed, I started thinking (s'about time!) about learning what the side effects of these meds were, so I got up and got the papers that came with them....but all it said on the sheet where there's usually patient/drug info was "see pharmacist for drug information".
Gah! I was too tired to go searching on the net, so I just went to sleep. Tommy was snoring on the couch again...he's been doing that lately. Falling asleep there and he can only be awakened by the pager going off. He's exhausted and it's too much trouble to wake him, so I usually just leave him there with a cover. Heh.
Anyhow, the boys both piled into our bed, and so we all went to sleep.
It would have been a really good sleep, I think, if not for excessive poodle peeing. Urgh. Tucker woke me up four or five times to go pee or poop or both. Why the dog has such a nocturnal elimination system is beyond me, but he was unusually active last night.
I was VERY off balance and just felt like lead. It wasn't like a light-headed buzzy feeling as with a pain med, but a very thick, heavy feeling. Not good when trying to navigate to a poodle release area in the dark. Sheesh.
So, it started snowing late yesterday. We didn't get to enjoy watching it fall, but there was a thickish skiff on and with no cover on the patio, it gets snowed over quickly....which apparently confuses Tucker into thinking he's actually in the yard. Therefore, there are three or four poodle pee ice slicks on the patio today.
And when you holler "Don't slip on the pee ice!" it comes out sounding like something else entirely and makes your kid look at you with his mouth open in that "Ommm!" fashion. Sheesh! Do ya want I should not to warn youse about da potential slippage hazards thereon? Huh??
Oh well. Anyhow, I woke up stuffed tight as a drum this morning. UGH! I haven't been this stuffy in a long time. So, I'm snuffing up eucalyptus-laced steam and downing herbal teas as hard as I can. I'm supposed to take the decongestant twice a day, so I guess I'll do that this morning...and do the nasal squirtage med, too...but as I'm hunting down these generic 'scripts for info online, I'm finding out what made my mouth dry as powder overnight.
The decongestant.
Good GRIEF!
As for the pain stuff, I'd never heard of it before, but it's basically a combination of several things I have taken. It does help turn the pain level down a couple of notches, but it doesn't relieve it to the point where you would not feel as if you need something for pain. Did that make sense? I mean if I got a headache that was the level of pain that the med takes the Monster Headaches to, I'd be trying to find something to relieve the pain still.
*sigh*
I have a high resistance to pain meds. Whenever I say this to a doctor, however, I am quickly labeled (either mentally by the doc or in my chart!) as a risk for addiction!!! GAH!
Both of my c-sections? The anesthesiologists would always have to administer additional meds and they both commented on how unusual it was for me to need the higher dose. With Corey, the anesthesesiologist told Tommy that he'd given me the maximum dose for my size....and I could still feel whenever I was touched...and I was awake. And whenever I've been given a pain med for whatever...after a surgery or for some joint thing, etc....it was usually something that others in my family had been prescribed at some time...and the dose that covered pain for them (or made them feel buzzed) would not even touch my pain. I simply have a high resistance to those things. And it sucks! Plain as that.
Back to the info search --- I'm looking up the sleep med and it also can cause dry mouth. Ha. And a lot of other things. I'm not sure I'm liking this stuff. It's an older medicine that was originally used to treat depression. It may be worth my while (and extra expense) to ask about some of the newer sleep 'scripts. My mom and sister both have Rx's for those that they use occasionally and they work well for them.
*sigh*
So much crap to deal with. Grrr! And I'm still feeling pretty groggy. Mostly when I move, though. I don't feel that way so much when I'm being still. Maybe I'll go back to bed.
Not.
I have WAY too much to do. My house has gone to pot after doing so well keeping it tidy for the past two weeks. *cry* I hate when that happens. But I've just felt so crappy!!! CRAP-PPPEEEEEE! GRRR!
Alright. I'm sorry. I'll stop growling at you and release you now. Thanks for coming by to check on me. A prayer or two would be greatly appreciated when you think of it.
The Headache is here. *sigh* I guess I'm off to the pile o' pill bottles now. *woe is me* God, give me strength today?
~hugs ya'll~
So, I went to the doctor today.
And yes, I did carry on and cry and stuff. But honestly...I couldn't help it. The Killer Headache was back and it was all I could do to not climb the walls and claw at my face, uhkay?
*sigh*
I really REALLY like this doctor. He LISTENS! What a grand attribute to find in a doctor!! It should be mandatory, says I.
So he's in there doing the physical for Tommy. He's checking his eyes and his blood pressure and his pee and all that stuff. He asked about his cholesterol and when we said we couldn't remember when it was last checked, he wanted him to come in one morning and get that done. He explored the whole stiffness and back pain that Tommy has had for the last few years and prescribed him something to help with that.
At this point, I hadn't sprung my secret plan on him yet, but he looked over at me and said I looked sleepy. I had my head mashed into the corner where I was sitting to keep from banging it into the wall.
It was then I told him I was about to die any moment and I had come to beg mercy of him.
He chuckled and said, "Oh. Okay."
Soon as he was done with Tommy, he asked what was going on with me. When I proceeded to tell him, he held up his hand and said, "I don't think this is going to be a quick fix. Do you mind I have them pull your chart and we just make an appointment out of this?"
Do you see why I'm about to nominate this man for sainthood? HE LISTENS! AND HE MAKES TIME!!!!!
Ahhh. Good, good doctor.
Tommy and I both had apologized about me tagging along on his appointment already and at this point, I told him to triple bill us if he wanted to, I just needed some help BAD!
He chuckled again and left to get the "appointment" started. The nurse came to get vitals for the record and put me back in the room. Tommy hung around to see what the final verdict might be...oh, and to tell stuff on me, too.
Sheesh.
I start again telling him what's been going on, how I've had this massive headache last weekend, then starting again today. He seems much less concerned about the change in the tinnitus and I let that go, because like I said, there's just not a whole lot that can be done for it and right now? All I want is for my head to quit hurting.
He had already asked me once before he decided to make this an appointment if I ever had migranes. And now, he asked me again. Both times, I told him I didn't know. He asked me this time if I'd ever taken any migrane 'scripts. I told him no and I don't wanna, thanks.
He poo-pooed me and proceeded to look in my mouth and ears. He then started asking about the sinus thing.
Gah. The Sinus Thing. It is monumental and has plagued me from my earliest memories. I've tried all sorts of medicines and occasionally something will help for a little while, but mostly nothing really takes care of the problem. It's not seasonal, although it will worsen at different times of the year, and it doesn't seem to be an allergy unless it is to myself, which would explain everything.
But alas...at this point, Tommy busted in with what he thought would be a tattle to tell on me...my be-n-e-dryl habit.
But he didn't know I'd already told Doc about that. But now Doc looked more closely at it. He said the 'dryl would dry me up, but nothing more. Well, dry is something of a problem all by itself, but the biggest reason I started taking it was to get a bit of sleep. But I am up to 125 mgs at this point and I still don't sleep so good...
So Doc then tells me how it can build up in the system and stop working or worse, it can start doing a sorta delayed reaction thing in which case it doesn't make you feel drowsy until the next day! Lovely. Just what I DON'T need!
Okay, you can have HAVE the be-ne-dryl, so what can I do?!
Oh, wait...I tell him I also take a cl-ar-i-tin generic OTC stuff each morning as well. Hmmm. He then writes me a 'script for some different allergy med to try, gives me a bagful of nasal spray Rx samples and another 'script for something to help me sleep.
Then Tommy proceeds to tell him how I stop breathing in my sleep. It was then my turn to poo-poo people and I told Doc I don't do it all the time, and besides, when I stop breathing, I wake myself up so it's all cool, right?
No. Of course not. Tommy informs him (and ME!) that I do it a lot more than that AND that I don't always wake myself up. I merely "snort and wiggle around", says he, and go back to breathing again.
Hmph. Why don't people tell me these things?
So, he wants me to do a sleep study and see what all's going on whilst I am sleep apnea-ing. Sheesh. I dunno when that will be, but rest assured, you will be informed.
Heh.
By the time it was all said and done, he'd fixed me up with the 'scripts I mentioned and was about to send me out the door. He had assured me that this was just a first step in tracking down the cause of these headaches and that was all well and good....
BUT I AM IN PAIN!!!!!
...so, he also wrote me something to help with this claw-my-face-off pain. It's controlled, of course, so he was all lecturey about not taking it too often, yadda, yadda. Then he said, "You know I have to tell you all this stuff even though I know you're not an addict."
*whew* After all the times I've dealt with different doctors who don't seem to understand the extent of my pain and are more busy looking at me sideways everytime I ask for something to relieve it...well, this was a nice change.
So I've been properly (we hope!) medicated and am feeling a bit better. The pain isn't completely gone, but at least I'm not a candidate for a straight jacket anymore.
Praise the Lord for that!!
I'm hopeful that the sleep stuff will indeed help me get a good, restful night in and if it does...it'll be the first one in way too many years. I won't know how to behave if this works.
I just hope the sinus stuff will work AND that it's going to relieve the headaches. The ringing? Well, we'll have to address that at the next appointment, I suppose.
If the head pain is gone, I am certain I can wait til then.
Hope ya'll are having a wunnerful Wednesday.
Be careful what you post....like this:
Click above for the reason.
Did you guess that this post might be about something ringinggggg? Ah. I thought not....
So...not too much discussion about the tinnitus thing in the post below.
I'm curious...is it because none of you suffer from it or you just don't have anything to add? No stories about how Great Aunt Victrola had rangin' in her ears and it made her drool and swat all about her head like a loon?
Hmm. Okay.
But I am seriously having more problems with this blasted ringing. ARGH! I DO have to thank God that at least my headache is MUCH better!! *WHEW!* The ringing, though...it's still here. And still LOUD.
I read how caffiene can make it worse, but I really haven't been drinking a lot more of that lately. I NEVER take asprin anymore, ever since the diagnosis way back in the olden days. I don't subject myself to loud noises. Remember, I tend to be pretty sensitive to sound.
So WHAT THE HECK IS MAKING IT WORSE?!?!?
*sigh* I just dunno.
Tommy has an appointment with Dr. K on Wednesday for his CDL physical. I'm thinking I might go with him. *sigh*
I mean, if I just bust in there with him for his physical and cry and carry on loud enough, he can't just turn me out in the street in my sad condition.....can he???? CAN HE!?!??!?!?
I guess we'll find out, because unless this is lots better by then, I'm going. He'll HAVE to throw me out because I can't stand this much longer. The Stuper Bowl is going in the next room, the dog occasionally yaps at me, someone will hoot over the TV or the computer back there...and the road noise--the occasional loud vehicle I hear...all these noises are going - - - but I still hear the ringing, screeching, trilling...whatever....and normally, it'd be drowned out by these other noises.
*sigh*
We still don't have the network thing worked out. Despite having consulted 2 techno-geek types from Tommy's work, one he used to work with and our Japanese-American friend who we can hardly understand but who laughs a lot at anything he undertands us say, and a very detailed flow-chart drawn on the back of an envelope showing the supposed way things should be...
Nothing works.
But we can all share the 'net....and so we can all talk to each other without really talking to each other, we have installed a certain instant message jiggy on all the computers.
We've had a blast sending silly stuff to each other. Corey sends recordings on his. Tommy has been repeatedly freaked out and amazed by various farting noises I've sent him. I think it makes him feel...y'know...in his element or something. I have had a blast setting various pictures like this
*heh heh*
Acourse, then he started threatening to find his own kinda pix, as if the world isn't flooded with that stuff constantly anyhow. *huff* So...*sigh* I had to stop being mean.
But really....can you blame me? *wink* Can I help it if he has SUCH a nice face? *sigh*
*ahem!* 'scuse me while I wipes the drool off my face. He's the one celeb crush I've had ever since Remington Steele! LOL! Gah! How long ago was THAT????? Sheesh.
I know what you're thinking.
And NO! I haven't been drooling over those pix and THAT'S what's making my ears ring.
Sheesh, people. Let's be realistic here!
*heh*
Happy Week to ya!
too much technology could kill you
#1 -- yes, dsl is faster.
#2 -- yes, I think I am going to like it.
#3 -- no, connecting the dsl jiggy was not hard.
#4 -- yes, connecting the dsl jiggy while simultaneously trying to set up a home network that includes a laptop, etc., is a very insane thing to do.
#5 -- yes, this may be my undoing.
#6 -- yes, if you don't hear from me again, donate my brain to science.
Obviously, I'm not a rapper. And even if I were, I wouldn't be doin' no rappin' today.
The Monster Headache To End All Headaches is still here.
But in a rare optimistic moment, I am glad to announce to you that so is DSL!
F-I-N-A-L-L-Y!!!!!
So, even though my headache is still here and as nasty as ever, at least it isn't being exacerbated by a crappy dialup connection.
See? There's always something positive if you just dig hard enough and be sure to grit your teeth.
;)
Happy Weekend, ya'll.
I don't know about you, but I've gotten waaaaay more emails than I care to about software, male enhancement and online drug stores.
Sure, I have a spam filter, but the stuff is still sitting there in the spam folder, so I have to look at it to delete it. I don't mean that I read the stuff, but the subject lines are enough to make one lose one's hard-won outward appearance of sanity.
Yeah.
And when the subject lines fail to grab your attention, those idiotic names in the 'from' area will do it.
Just so you know, an email from [Dirk=Peck] is probably NOT one you wanna read.
(who comes up with these names!?!?!)
Head is still throbbing, for those who wondered. I'm so behind on blog visits, it's pathetic, but I just haven't had the time. I'll make my way around eventually, I promise.
I took a short nap this afternoon, hoping to sleep off the pain, but it didn't work. The boys were great in that they peeled potatoes and got them cooking up for soup. They even loaded the dishwasher and put away the dishes.
Corey went with Tommy to take Casey to ball practice. Now I'm by myself, listening to the steady shrieking in my head, trying to talk myself into getting busy on some clean up that needs doing. I keep telling myself it won't be so bad.
But Myself doesn't buy it. That Myself. She's a smart one.
While I didn't hit myself in the head with my shot-putting purse manuver, I DO have one of those killer headaches goin' on.
Gah. It hurts to blink.
I am mostly done with The Task Of Which We Do Not Speak, which is probably why I have The Atomic Headache From You-Know-Where. Ya think?
I think that probably contributed to the monster headache, but the ringing is driving me nuts, too. Maybe I've never mentioned this before, but I suffer from tinnitus. Have for decades. I think I was about 15 when the doc diagnosed it and told me it probably started from me taking asprin for headaches (those blasted headaches again!) instead of acetaminophen. How was I supposed to know?!?
So, for the past 20+ years, my ears ring. Every. Single. Day. Most of the time, it's not an issue. I usually hardly notice it except for when I'm trying to fall asleep. But there are some days when it's deafening. Today is one of those days. ARGH!!!!!
I went to the pharmacy this morning and paid ONE DOLLAR for a one-month supply of the generic script that just last week, I'd paid FIVE DOLLARS A PIECE for a mere five-day supply to get me through til my R-x insurance kicked in.
Good lord! That is one of the things that always makes me go "And people wonder what's wrong with our society???" The fact that something so ridiculous is allowed and there is no revolting in the streets is what's wrong with society!! GAH!
So, I'm very thankful to have this here generic stuff. I pray that there's nothing that will make it so that I can't use it instead of the brand name stuff. PLEASE!!
It's cloudy and icky here, but the temps are mild. They're forecasting an inch of snow for tonight, though. Who knows?
I just hope this headache goes away because my house looks like a paper shredder exploded in it. I kinda need to clean it up. Urgh!
Okay...I can't stand this screeching in my ears anymore. I gotta go find something to distract me besides the clacking of the keyboard. Hope you're having a lots nicer day than me!!!
~hugs~
Person 1: *forgotten, generic smart remark to Person 2*
Person 2: You'd better watch it or I'll hit you with my purse!
Person 1: *smirks*
Person 2: I mean it. I'll hit you with it and send you to the hospital, buddy.
Person 1: No you couldn't. You couldn't even swing it that hard.
Person 2: Oh yes I could. If I get it swinging round and round fast enough, I'd knock you into the next county.
Person 1: Yeah right.
Person 2: Yeah, you bet! I could sling it around like one-a them shot putters.
Person 1: A WHAT?!?!?!
Person 2: You know. A shot putter. One-a them guys that throws the bowlin' ball-lookin' things?
Person 1: Oh yeah. .....but you couldn't do it.
Person 2: You want to try me?
Person 1: No. We're in W@lm@rt now and I'm going to electronics.
Person 2: Well, okay. I'll call you when I'm done getting groceries. But I'm showing you that purse thing later.
Person 1: Yeah, whatever Mom.
Not much to tell ya today. It's cold as ice during the night, then up in the mid-50's in the day. My ol' body can't take too much of this stuff.
Thankfully, the joints aren't crying out in protest too loudly. *whew*
I was thinking, though, about how long it's been since ya'll were subjected to a whiny, desperate post about how bad my feet were hurting or how miserable I was with some other pain of some sort.
God is SO good!!! When I think back to how bad it hurt to just stand up in the mornings? Well, it makes me wanna shout! :) So...excuse me a moment while I thank the Lord?
=====
*ahem* Thanks. ;) Seriously though, I'm really thankful that at least I don't have to deal with that pain so much anymore.
I finally got the card for my R=x insurance. It goes into effect today! YEHAW!!!! You can't imagine how nice it is not to have to worry about being able to afford meds! Or having to buy just a portion of the script so you don't die til you can afford more. Gah! It's really pathetic that our country has (& yes, continues to) allowed this kind of situation to develop. I think about people who have way more and more expensive meds to buy than I do....it sure makes life hard. *sigh*
Anyhow, now I can get what I need without scrimping on the groceries or putting off some other bill.
We should be getting some rebate money in soon, too. Corey got the smallest of his several rebates in a few days ago. LOL....it was kinda funny seeing him open that MiCr0-S0fT envelope, hoping it was his hunnerd-bucks rebate check...only to find it was his five-bucks one. *sigh* Well, hopefully the other will be following shortly AND so will some of our rebate money, too!
We got the t@x software, so it's time for me to get my tail busy rounding up bits of paper. Gah. We have two "file drawers", so called, built into the desk in the kitchen...but they aren't big enough for anything. Pththt! Actually, they're pretty useless for keeping a year's worth of receipts in. Urgh! It drives me nuts when by about September, I can't fit one single more slip of paper in that drawer!
We have an old metal two-drawer filing cabinet sitting in the kitchen. We use one drawer for owner's manuals and other info on appliances and electronics and the other for cookbooks. I dearly want to have a four drawer cabinet so I can move our files over and actually have room for everything ALL YEAR LONG! I'm hoping we might luck onto one at a flea market or something.
Okay, so anyhow, I need to start the annual paper pile sorting in preparation for doing the thing of which we don't speak. Sheesh. Can you tell I'm not looking forward to it?!
Other news? Um, there really isn't any. Corey's worked with my dad for the past two days. It is getting to be something that's just not good. Dad needs to sell the business. It's too big and too hard for him to keep at with just him and whoever else he can get to help. He has jobs running out his ears and he can't possibly do them all. He's constantly run down and at 62? I don't have a clue how he does it. I worry about him all the time!!
When Corey helps him, it's like he's got a whole new life about him. He can do so much more with Corey there than he can with just my FIL, ya know? And he let's Corey know it, too. And I don't mean that he compliments Corey. No, he just says things...things that make Corey feel guilty if he doesn't help his pap. I don't think Dad means to do it, but I know exactly how Corey feels. I've been in that position over and over through the years. That feeling that if you don't help him, he's going to lose the job, his business, etc., etc.
*siiiiigh*
It just makes Corey resent any help he does give, ya know? Brings him to the point of tears sometimes, just the frustration of trying to keep up with his school while being made to feel as if he's causing his grandfather to lose his business!
ARGH! I told Corey that it wasn't worth it...being able to make a bit of money without being tied down to some other job...if it made him feel so bitter toward his grandpa. I just don't know what to do. When I (cuz I've done it in the past) say something to either Mom or Dad about this, it's always that Corey took it wrong, and that's not what was meant, etc., etc.
I just don't know what to do, but I DO know that I can't stand to see my child torn into this way. I'm not going to just stand by and watch it happen, either. I'll have to go through the same ol' song and dance again...telling them how the comments make him feel...hearing how it wasn't actually that way, etc....but I am going to have to tell them that Corey can't work with Dad as long as he makes those kinds of comments.
I just don't think Daddy can NOT make them. Seriously...he used to occasionally say things much like that to me when I was a kid. And I seriously don't think he meant to lay such a burden on me...he was just venting, I guess....but then there's the times, when I was older, when he DID make me feel as if I would be deserting him if I didn't help....
*weary sigh* Now I've made him sound like a monster, and he's not. But he does have some very disagreeable characteristics. Very, very disagreeable. :(
Okay...that wasn't what I intended to write when I started here...but just like a good therapy session...the thorns under my skin come out when I start 'talking'.
Prayers would be appreciated regarding this thing with Corey? Thanks.
I have to vamoose now. Gotta get a few groceries lest we go a night without shredded cheese, milk or ice cream. LOL!
Happy February to ya!