Society for the Preservation of My Sanity

my poor little poodle.

tucker is a funny little dawgie. he demands that you get up in the morning and open the kitchen door so he can sit in the direct sunlight coming in on the eastern-facing side of the house.

and woe unto us when the sun don't shine. ack! and lately? the sun, it ain't been a-shinin'. today's been all gray and rainy and coolish. but i have to say, at least, thank You, Lord, it's not been as bitingly cold as it felt a few days ago. the wind's not blowing and stuff. but still.

gah.

while i'm all for autumn and the change of seasons... *sigh* i could do without all the gray clouds and dreary skies too, buddy.

Posted by subject G~ at 04:34 PM | Permalink | Comments (3) | TrackBacks (0)

I cooked carrots for the dog.

What? They're GOOD for you, right? Full of vitamins and stuff?

Oh just shut up!!

Posted by subject G~ at 11:02 AM | Permalink | Comments (12) | TrackBacks (0)

...give a dog a bone.

...and then another one, and another one, and another one....

That's what we've been doing for the past three days. I know some of you will probably be very disappointed in me, but we couldn't handle it anymore and had to do something about the situation.

So on Friday, we took Lucy and Li'l Girl to the county animal shelter. *sigh*

I really hated to do it, but we've been trying for months to find someone who would take either of them. Lucy has always been pretty hateful with other dogs. She's like jealous and wants to let them know she's the one who deserves alllll the attention. She'd never even think of biting someone, but another dog? Even her own pups? She was just wearin' 'em out every time we let them out of the pen, or came out the door, or got out of the vehicle or other random times. We'd hear her growl so hatefully, then hear one of the pups, usually Chubs, squawl. *sigh*

Li'l Girl was almost as bad. We realized that Lucy was not allowing the pups to sleep in the roomy doghouse, so we moved another one into the pen. Wanna know what happened? Lucy kept hers, Li'l Girl took the new one, and Chubsly would be out in the dirt/mud/rain curled up tiny as he could get on a little scrap of old towel.

I was just sick of them treating him so bad!!! If you put the two pups in the pen alone with two bowls of food set at a good distance apart, Li'l Girl would keep Chubs out of BOTH of them. She could be a real terror when it came to poor Chubsy.

So anyhow, we took them, Case and I. Corey was working and I needed help getting them there. Li'l Girl puked twice before we got there. Gag! Casey was a little torn up about it already, so after we'd got them out of the car and the guy put them in a pen I had to go sign some papers. I never thought about Casey staying where he was at all....but I should have.

I'm a terrible mother.

When I came back, he was sitting in the front of the Explorer bawling his eyes out.

I am SUCH a bad mother. *sigh*

If' I'd been THINKING, I could have gotten Mom's huge dog crate and put them both in that and taken them myself, but it never entered my mind til after the fact. Then, I shouldn't have left him there where he could hear the dogs whining.

I felt like crap for putting him through that. Crap. :(

*siiiiiiiigggh*

Anyhow, poor Chubs. We put him in the pen before we left just to make sure he didn't run off looknig for the others or anything. When we got back, he was crying somethin' awful. We let him out and loved on him for a long time. He just ate it up since he's always been a lovey-dovey, but never really got a chance to BE loved up becase of the other two jumping all over the place.

He is really a babydoll, with such long soft hair! I don't know how he stays so clean with such long hair, but he does. I know he's only 6 months old, but I've never seen him with a burr or matt in his hair ever. I hope it stays that way.

So about that paddy-wack stuff....I bought a bag of those huge bone-shaped biscuits just for him and we'd been giving them to him in pretty quick succession. It made The Little Thing so dadgone tickled, we couldn't help it!! He'd grab it, and go kinda like doggy-skipping across the yard, then plop down with this doggy-grin and kinda toss it around a bit, then chomp down and devour it....doing the doggy-grin the whole time.

He pretty much stays on the porch, never runs out into the road like the other two did, he stops before he gets to my mom and dad's driveway (in the field0 and sits for awhile, then turns to go back home. Tucker's got to where he doesn't pick up his own chewies and walk over, practically rub them in Chub's face, then growl like a grisly at him like You see this, Punk? THIS is M I N E !!!! And you'd best not forget it! Now he just walks up to Chub and kinda whirls his butt around in Chub's face.

What is it with dogs and their butts?!?! Lucy used to always sit on any dog that was smaller or younger than her. That was her dominatrix thing, ya know? It was hilarious, too. But she took it veeeerry seriously! Of course, Tucker's way too short to actually sit on Chub, but he keeps whirlin' that tail around in his face.

We're not sure if he's like saying See MY tail? It's lots prettier and fluffier than yours. But that doesn't make me less macho than you. And don't you forget it!! or is it more like Get a whiff of THIS, Buddy! Now THIS is some R E A L dawg butt right cheer! Yay-uh!

*shrugs with hands in air* WHAT DOES IT MEAN?!?!?!

The world may never know....

Posted by subject G~ at 04:26 PM | Permalink | Comments (6) | TrackBacks (0)

Brrrr.... here's a shot of the weather forecast for my area. I'm ALREADY freezing!! I love seeing the snow, though. We actually got almost three inches! WOW! I'm sure that's not impressive to you high-volume-snow people, but it's right nigh a miracle for SE Kentucky to get this much snow these days.

I'm thinking about getting this for Tucker:

Because I don't want my poodle to freeze. That's why.

He goes for a haircut tomorrow morning. After spending over three months growing out his fuzziness, he's a funny mess. Very hard to keep him clean and let's don't talk about the matting. GAH!

So, a haircut he gets. I'm taking him to the new place uptown. It's been highly recommended and it is a nice, clean place. It's also a fancy-shmancy pet doodads store. They had several prissy outfits for critters.

I think Tucker would just die of embarrassment! LOL!

BUT he doesn't have a sweater that fits his fatness anymore and he DOES like a good sweater when he's just lost his white fur coat, know what I mean?!?

When we were in the groomer store place, the few sweaters I saw, though not his size, were all pretty pricey. We don't want pricey. We want functional. We want warm. We want un-prissy. We want CHEAP!

See? We're not hard to please.

Anyhow, if they don't have a reasonalbly priced sweater in there, I think I'll just order that one.

Okay. That's it. No real reason for this post.

No.... Really none at all!

;) Tah-tah!

Posted by subject G~ at 09:08 AM | Permalink | Comments (6) | TrackBacks (0)

I got an email from Claire telling me about dog post day and she sent me to Faith or FIction for an example.

LOL!

Okay, so after bewailing Tucker's fondness for midnight and beyond pee-poo runs, I guess I'll hafta talk about why I put up with such aggravations..

First of all:::

Yes! Definitely!

Lord knows, had you tried to tell me two years ago that I would house and fall in love with a poodle....a POODLE mind you....I'd have told you you had most of your screws loose and pointed you to the hardward store to get yourself a heavy-duty screwdriver! And FAST!

Cuz it's like this...I grew up on a farm. WIth big ol' outside dawgs...bird dogs, beagles, mutts of all shapes and sizes. Poodles were sissy dogs. Little fluffy doofuses for doofussy people!

Yeah...amazing huh? But that's what I used to think! The only poodles I'd ever seen were all wearin' one of those frou-frou hair cuts and usually some sort of jewelery...or painted pink, etc.

My piano teacher had a black toy poodle. Her name was Betsy and she was MEAN! And she looked menacing with her silver-black curls and her coal-black eyes. Add to that those white bared teeth and you had one scary little dog!!! I couldn't stand her!

So, when this girl friend of Corey's showed us her poodle, I thought "Oh gah! I don't wanna see no poodle!" But meet Olivia we did....and we found a very nice little white poodle.

Well, she was sorta pinkish when we first met her because The Girl had dyed her pink.

How CRUEL!

Anyhow...a bit later, we found out that she was pregnant.

The POODLE, not The Girl!! Sheesh!

And when she produced SEVEN little poodle puppies, the pressure was on for us to adopt one.

The only time we'd ever had a "house dog" was for about 4 or 5 months when Lucy got run over and Tommy spoon-fed her and treated her like a baby. It's a wonder we ever got her outta here! But once springtime arrived, she really wanted out...and I really wanted her out, too, because she commenced to shedding like there was no tomorrow! Urgh!

That's Lucy with her puppies a few months ago. She showed up here on our doorstep in 1997 and she's been here ever since. She's hateful at times and she's selfish and grumpy....but she's also a good dog when she takes a notion. But I prefer her outside and not in here sharing her leftover fur!

So, that was the only indoor dog we'd ever had! It just wasn't in my makeup to have a dog in the house, much less actually take one in that would HAVE to be inside! Inconcievable!!!

But take him we did. He was the fatty of the pack and you just couldn't help but laugh at his rooting in on each of his sibling's teat territory. Always looking for the next helping of milk, he was. Sheesh!!!

Here's a shot of him in all his apricot glory...

Here they are after Tucker became a little less wary of his new surroundings and started bossing everyone around...

Here's Tucker in his favorite mature sleeping position...sheesh!

Tucker loves to be pampered....obviously!

Another example of His HighAndMightyness:::

But Tucker's not all about being seen. Sometimes he's just about cuddling in a blanky!

And then there is Tucker, the Adveturous. See:::

Another example---the white puff is Tucker playing Ring Around The Fort with a buddy of his...

And of course, all that leads to Tucker, the Nastyness. Observe:::

For the most part, Tucker loves his human slaves.

But mostly, he loves Mama.

So, yeah. We love Tucker, even though he treats us like servants.

But that might be kinda sorta our fault.....

Posted by subject G~ at 03:31 PM | Permalink | Comments (7) | TrackBacks (0)

After telling ya'll how Lucy and the two remaining pups were doing with the post-puppy-departure...I was totally side-swiped by Tucker's reaction to Trouble's departure.

*blink, blink*

Ever since Saturday afternoon, he's run around here, looking out one door, then another. Then when he's outside he's noticably looking for something or someone. He'll whine at me with this look of Where da poo did my buddy go?

Aw shoot. Poor little fella. *sigh* Not that I'd wanna keep ol' Trouble just because, well, he made a lot of trouble where Tucker was concerned. But I wish we'd not let him stay around so long.

*sigh*

Poor, poor Tucker.

Posted by subject G~ at 10:18 PM | Permalink | Comments (8) | TrackBacks (0)

Tah----

Here you have eight pups......
***2.5 hours at the flea market later***
....DAH!
Now you have only two!

We had super good luck at the flea market! Tommy and Casey came in from the woods before Corey and I were gone, so we all went together, which made it even nicer. We put Trouble's collar back on and got the small leash, piled five of the puppies into the tote, made a couple of signs and hit the road.

Most people that stopped would comment on how cute Trouble was, so it was a relief to have interest in him. We had to keep telling people that he was looking for a new home, too, since he was on the leash and stuck really close to us they would think he was ours.

First one pup, then one more....then Corey took Trouble to walk through the crowd when a boy about Casey's age came up to him and ask if he wanted to sell his dog. !!! I can't believe my shrewd son didn't even ask how much he'd give! LOL! So, then Trouble found a home and we had three pups left. Soon, someone else came by and took another one home. We took the last two and walked around with them. I had one and Casey was carrying another.

We were getting lots of looks, but only from people who "already had too many dogs". Tommy got to talking with one of the vendors so I started looking at a stack of jeans when I heard Casey say, "We have another one, too." and there he stood talking to this family that was cooing over his pup. When they saw mine (it was one of the fluffier pups) they wanted him, too. And so, we found homes for all the pups we had taken with us.

HOOORAY and praise the Lord!!! You can't imagine what a load off my mind that is!!!

Lucy didn't seem too awful upset and the other two pups (the fluffiest Chuggie and Li'l Girl) seemed only a little out of sorts, but I think they'll adjust quickly.

*Whew!*

I need to head back to town (we had to rush home so the two hunters could head back to the woods again) to get a bit of food, then I'm going to be in for the night and hopefully get to watch the rest of the Lost episodes I have from Bl0ckbu$ter Online.

I'm outtie!

Blessings---

Posted by subject G~ at 05:37 PM | Permalink | Comments (12) | TrackBacks (0)

Argh! I'm madder'n a wet settin' hen right now.

Remember the "nice" little mixed-up pup that was dropped off here a couple of weeks ago? We kept him thinking he was just lost and someone would claim him because he had on a collar? And he was all nice and good? Well, he is GETTING ON MY LAST NERVE!

It's not all him, but he's sure contributing heavily to the delinquency of a poodle.

Argh!

Every time Tucker goes out now, here come Trouble romping and playing. Trouble is now much more aggressive with Tucker, so Tucker runs. They're still semi-playful, but now the play is not confined to the yard. Oh noooOOOoo. Now Tucker will run all the way down to Mom's house, past that an on down to the pond. Where he gets smelly and dirty and muddy and nasty! ACK!

If he doesn't go down there, he will follow Trouble up the bank behind our house, across the corner of the cemetery and on up into the woods.

Tonight? Tonight he followed me and Mom outside, slipping out the door after being told to stay, and before I can get a couple of things put into Mom's backseat, he is gone.

Him and Trouble.

I yelled and hollered and screamed for him. But nothing.

Lately, I've taken to using a flyswatter on his ornery butt. In the daytime, it works like a charm because he can SEE it. But at night?? Yelling, "TUCKEEEER! I'VE GOT THE SWATTER, OL' BOY!" just doesn't make much impact on him. So I start calling and walking around the dark yard. Mom is all the while fussing and telling me I have to get a jacket on because I'm going to get pneumonia and die otherwise. Okay, not her exact words, but that's what she meant.

She keeps yammering at me about a jacket until next thing I know she's taken HER sweatjacket off and is sticking it in my face while putting on a coat she had gotten out of her car.

Yes. I do realize the woman is bonkers. I'm considering taking her with me to the flea market tomorrow. Or listing her on e-B@y. Ya think?

Then she says just ride down to the house with her. She's sure Tucker's down there. I am not so sure. I can't shut her up, so I go thinking I'll jump out of the car and run for it while she's digging in her purse for keys.

And I do pretty much that. I walk all the way up the hill to my house in the dark. Yes, the moon's almost full, but the path is overshadowed by thick pines. I make it up here safely, then open the back door, reach inside for my swatter and head up to the cemetery.

Now this cemetery doesn't scare me because it's not overgrown and spooky looking and I live beside it and no living dead people have come to get me yet. And frankly, by this point I am so mad that were a living dead person to attempt my abduction, I would rip off all Its appendages and make It wish It were dead dead instead! (I shoulda been a poet, yes?)

I holler and listen, holler and listen when I hear the faint tinkling of Tucker's tags. I hear him run up to the row of medium sized pines that mark the border of the cemetery. I am on this side of the pines, he is just on the other side in the cemetery. He stops and I order him to come in the calmest voice I can manage.

Then he comes galloping around to the opening and whizzes past me about 3 yards. I then swat toward him and tell him to get his butt to the house. He growls as he tucks tail and runs.

He always growls when he knows he's in trouble. It just gets it out the way for when he actually gets spanked. He was trying to avoid me so he ran down to the 'shallow' end of the long hill where the bank is. I take the short way, straight down the very steep bank, between the shop and dog pen where Lucy and The Seven Warts live. Right at the corner of the shop on the back side, there's supposed to be our tomato cages hung on a nail. The cages are still there, but they were no longer hanging on that nail.

I wouldn't know that except that in the black darkness there, I tripped over them and fell face-first in the yard. I jammed up my wrist a bit, bruised my knees and can already feel the soreness in my neck.

Needless to say that when I opened the door and Tucker ran in, I swatted the snot outta him.

There are entirely too many dogs around here. Tomorrow, if nothing else, Trouble leaves. And maybe I'll start talking to his protoge again.

Maybe.

Posted by subject G~ at 06:19 PM | Permalink | Comments (4) | TrackBacks (0)

Er, um...wait. That's not exactly what The Wicked Witch of the West said to Dorothy in The Wizard of Oz, but that's what the Witch of the Cemetery said to Casey today.

Gah! That old bat!

I'm sorry if I seem to be disrespecting my elders here, but that woman has never earned an ounce of respect in her whole life. She's nasty, gossipy and tries to cause trouble anywhere she can.

She's come over here several times insinuating that our dogs were carrying off the flowers from her elaborate mausoleum. They never have. There ARE many stray dogs and other woodland creatures around here, y'know. I'm surprised she hasn't set up surveillence cameras or some kind of shot gun trip wires. In this burial plot which is more about one-upping anyone else, is indeed set with a honkin' mausoleum with a marble bench, the family name carved in the part where your butt would hang over. It's all fenced off with black plastic chain and wooden posts. Inside the marble box-for-three lies her father and mother with their names displayed with extreme prominence and a space for herself as she's the self-appointed family plot guardian. Never mind that she has other siblings.

I guess none of them wanna be planted next to her?

She's even come over here when we had GUESTS and drilled them about who was carryin' off her flowers. And did you SEE anyone over there? Um, no, we don't live here. But did you see any strange vehicles around? Ah, no. We. Don't. Live. Here.

When I spotted her standing out on the porch interrogating our company, I sent Tommy out to deal with her as I was trying to cook! She went through the same thing with him.

Well, you LIVE here, for Pete's sake (and yes, she says things EXACTLY like that, all hateful and impatient) don't you ever notice who's going up in the cemetery?
No, actually. There's a row of 25-foot tall pines over there so we can't see what's going on.
Well, looks like to me you'd know when there's strangers around and call the law when people are tearing stuff up over there!
Well I'll tell you what, if you want 24 hour security, then you should hire someone because we aren't here to stand guard over your graves.

Gah! She finally huffed off, but man, she is a pistol to deal with!

Today, we'd just got back from picking up Corey. Tucker was with us, of course, and he jumped out first thing. He usually makes a round trip and sometimes over into the cemetery for a looksee. To make sure there are no weirdos or anything he's not seen before over there.

Today, he sees Miss Gulch herself. She's got this ridiculous gitup on...dark sun glasses, wide-brimmed hat with a scarf tying it on, a bulky ill-fitting coat, and gloves.

He, of course, starts to bark. (wouldn't you?) We could hear him, and were calling for him to come....then I hear You git outta here! You git! I didn't know who it was from my position on the porch, but I could tell that someone was way too hateful and we'd better get over there fast.

Casey was closer to the row of pines, so I told him to hurry, that someone was yelling at Tucker. By the time I got close enough to peek under the pines, I saw her standing there with her rake, swinging it at Tucker. Then she turned on Casey and hollered, You'd better get that dog away from here. Ain't no dogs supposed to be in here. I'll call the law on you!

GRRR! I hollered over, That little dog ain't gonna hurt you then under my breath you old hateful bat!

I know...not very Christlike of me. At least I didn't say it out loud. Truth told, she probably never even heard the first part either!

Gah! She makes me so mad!! I'm just glad she doesn't come around often. Her family is one of the big-wig clans in the town and she thinks she's some mighty power wielder, but everyone knows her for what she is. A hateful, bitter old penny-pincher who doesn't care about anyone but herself.

I wish she would call the law. I'd like to see the faces of the deputies when I show them the monsterous dog she's claiming almost bit her face off. Um...yeah. This 10-pound poodle was more scared of her than she was of it.

And rightly so, says I. Nyah!

Posted by subject G~ at 05:27 PM | Permalink | Comments (2) | TrackBacks (0)

I mentioned in the previous entry Tucker's reluctance to go to bed unless I do. It's true! He's really rotten when it comes to hanging around with me.

And I like that. I mean, most of the time the guys will go off doing something and leave me all alone. *sniffle* But Tucker never leaves me.

Matter of fact the crazy poodle will follow me around the house ALL DAY LONG.

If I sit on the loveseat, he jumps up and squishes up beside my leg, not budging. If I get up, he will get up...even if he's fallen asleep. If I go to the computer, he'll sit at my feet and beg to jump up. He nestles in behind me, but it must always be with his head on my left side. ALWAYS. If he's not behind me in the chair, he'll be curled up and/or sprawled out in the floor beside my feet. If I get up, he follows me. If I go into the kitchen, he stays close by. He even accompanies me into the throne room. If he's not sitting at the base of my porcelain pedestal, he's just outside the door with his little poodle nose peeking underneath to make sure I'm not sneaking out the window on him.

He is rotten.

Even if I tell him I'll be coming right back, he has to go with. Poor dog. You'd think he'd be skinny with all that jumping up and down. But then again...I'm not skinny...okay...bad theory there.

Another thing he's rotten for is going with me in the car. Anytime Corey puts on his work clothes, Tucker is all aquiver. His ears perk up and he gets this expression on his face like Oh goody! The car, the car, the car! We're going in the CAR! and I'm riding in the front!

He jumps and makes that little half-bark sound and whimpers. And God forbid I'm not quite ready to leave yet because he will run back and forth between the door and wherever I am, whining to me, then running to the door to hop up and down on his hind legs, barking.

Gah! Silly dog! ;)

Corey's leather seats are not Tucker's friend. He slides and scoots and ends up riding all over the whole car before the trip is over. He must ride to and from taking Corey to work. He MUST.

And when Corey beeps my phone and says, "I'm off." Tucker immediately starts his dance all over again. He knoooooowsssss.

If I have to leave without him, he is good about minding the 'stay' command, but the sad little poodle face he makes sitting at the door is about more than I can take sometimes.

Heh. Yep, he's rotten.

But, really....how could he not be?

Posted by subject G~ at 11:37 AM | Permalink | Comments (12) | TrackBacks (0)